It was not your anger that changed me to a better person. It was the trust. Sadly, it was not yours.
It was not your demanding acts that made me move forward. It was the motivation. Sadly, you didn’t become one.
It was not your ego that pushed me to fight hard. It was the reason. Sadly, you’re not the one.
But yes it was you, who motivated my silences and gave me the reason to have more spaces of my own. Sadly, you still are.
And I’m freeing myself away.
No. Things will never be the same. You will have that hole for a lifetime. Nothing will ever replace the existance that lost. Things will become harder and harder. You will recall that name each morning right after you open your eyes. And whisper that name each night before you fall asleep. E-ve-ry-day. Until God knows when. You’ll cry. Or laugh blatantly. It will hurt. You’ll never stop asking ‘why?’, no matter how hard you tried to silence the mind. There will be times when you have no other choice but to smile and say “It’s okay.”, and repeat it over and over again to yourself, until you believe, that it is okay to feel that way. It is okay to live a life that no one could really understand. And you accept that it is the new normal. And you just do whatever you have to do. You dragged your heart and you keep alive. It is okay. Take a deep breath, you are okay. hugs
I’m attracted to ones that are a little off. Ones that don’t provide all of the answers. Ones that couldn’t be completely owned. Ones that couldn’t be completely understood. And ones that don't require explanation all the time.
I'm attracted to the rarest one.
Tidak akan pernah bisa kita membandingkan karya seseorang dengan lainnya. Dan memang bukan begitu juga cara kita menghargai sebuah karya.
Sebuah karya butuh waktu dan pemahaman untuk dapat bekerja secara maksimal. Tujuan tiap orang membuat karya berbeda – beda, maka sudah tentu hasil karyanya akan berbeda juga.
Sebuah karya itu seyogyanya adalah hasil dari
“The time passes us by, and we’ll named it ‘the past’ for the things that linger in our heart.”
I used to think that life is like circling around. We pass the same route again and again but we are getting better each time. We fall on our first time, we knew where was the hole on our second, we knew where to slow down and jump on our third, we increase our speed on our fourth, and so on.
I thought I’m gonna excell this life one day. That I’ll be able to walk with my eyes closed and it won’t be a circling anymore but maybe some different or new routes. But I guess what my friend said was right. “We will never become expert in life. We are just become more experienced on how to control ourselves.”
It is easy to put so much control in life. To judge life based on the right or the wrong. However, what is right and what is wrong don’t really relate to what we truly feel.
Most of us have been so caught up with our pain and sadness, that we suck up and crave of words.
Words that could represent the unspoken feelings and thoughts of ours. Words that heal our numb heart and make it beats a while. Words that touch our broken souls.
But those kind of words
When you see my weaknesses, that’s because I let you to. When you feel my sadness, that’s because I show you. When you witness my sorrow, that’s because I trust you to. When you find me rely on you, that’s because I believe in you.
Otherwise, you will only see my happiness.